Fellatio
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# Do not add and
The opposite of [[anal sex]]. Fellatio is a Latin word which means "the act of [[cockmongler|sucking cock]]". [[Your Mom]] does this really well, but your dad needs more practice.
It's also A character in William [[Shakespeare]]'s The Tempest. Not to be confused with Bond villain henchman, Oddjob (unless that was one of those "odd jobs" he was named after).
[[Texas]] [[Republican]]s have introduced a law to outlaw gay sex and sodomy. Problem is, sodomy includes fellatio and therefore all blowjobs would be illegal in Texas which ironically would make Texas the gayest state in the Union.
Be very careful when considering to offer fellatio, as you are going down a one way path. Think long and hard on what this whoring expert has to say of the matter:
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Technique
Explanations on how to get head—written by an [[expert]]!
# Get her really drunk
# [[????]]
# [[Profit|Get her to suck your dick]]!
The Variation, popular with [[self injury]] folk:
# While she is sucking, tell her that you will [[rape]] her.
# She will at this point bite your penis off.
# [[Fail|Awesome!]].
Gay head
Gay head is different because you do not have to get any girls drunk. All gay men love giving head so you don't have to even worry if you're ugly or have a small hairy cock. Gay men will suck on any cock at any time. This is because if you are gay you can either suck cock or take it up the [[ass]], so [[you|gay men]] don't have many options to choose from.
Autofellatio
Moar info: [[|
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What [[you]] tried every day as a kid. Auto-fellatio is hard to describe, but http://www.collegesexadvice.com/suck-dick.shtml" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">How to Suck Your Own Dick gives a good guide. Also [[TOW]] has a [[Wikipedia:File:Autofellation drawing 2.svg|nice image]][[Media:Autofellation_drawing_2.svg.png|[1]]] of it and [[Wikipedia:Autofellatio#Physical aspects|info on its feasibility]]—further proving that [[Jimbo Wales]] is a [[sick fuck]].
Slang
Fellatio is the medical term—what are kids using on the street?
* [[Lulz]]ing balls
* Becoming [[rich and beautiful]]
* Getting your dick sucked by your mom you fucking [[fruit]]
* [[Chookling]] mah [[13-year-old boy|playmates]] (see [[Didaskalos]])
* Drinking from the [[Cock|Garden Hose]]
* Sucking Sausage
* "[[:Image:Cooldudeirl.jpg|Shit was SO cash]]"
Benefits for Women
Besides being a quicker way to that big promotion, a blowjob has also been shown in various studies to be a more effective way for [[fat]] chicks to get laid. Many of these studies were done during the [[Clinton]] Administration. For [[anorexic]] girls, semen consumption provides assorted proteins and lastly, a forced blowjob makes any women learn her place.
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See Also
* [[Do You Want To Play With My Balls]]
* [[Gay]]: If a guy is doing this to you
* [[Here Comes The Airplane]]
* [[Johnny Somali]]
* [[No Homo]]: Save against the gay
* [[Sex]]: Like a Blowjob with chance of [[breeder|babies]]!
* [[Woman]]: Giver of Blowjobs
* [[You]]: [[Truth|Someone who'll never receive a blowjob]].
External Links
* http://www.dontspitswallow.com" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">dontspitswallow.com - "Cock suckers united to help you swallow."
* http://www.xgentube.com/video/9814/German-bathroom-blowjob-creampie-from-Share-Adult/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">German bathroom blowjob
* http://analsixxdoesntcount.tumblr.com/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Brittany Sixx Blowjob
* http://www.yaptube.com/watch/bar_tender_blow_job.html" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">try here.http://www.spankwire.com/Blonde-Bartender-Sucks-the-Schlong-TWICE/video111453/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">cumshot BONUS!
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[[Category:IRL Shit]]
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