Spotify

Page ID: 1489 Last updated: 4 weeks ago Namespace: 0

Content

Spotify is a shitty [[Swedish]] [[audio]] streaming service that claims to allow its users to listen to [[music]] for free, but forgets to mention that the service includes promotional [[EXTREME ADVERTISING|LGBT pride ads]], artists battling in a pay-to-win war over their [[snoca|dogshit songs]], and 73% useless bloat. Their software takes up hundreds of megabytes of space, with a laggy and slow [[UI]] full of ads, easily [[botnet|ass-raping your RAM]].

Wanna break from the ads.jpg

The streaming quality is worse than a broken [[radio]] from the 19[[80s]] and the songs themselves sound like they were recorded on an [[Autotune|auto-tuned]] [[Toaster Steve|toaster]] full of compression and distortion. Rarely will you find anything of worth.

In general, it's much more worthwhile to [[Soulseek|download your music]] and listen to it with an audio player, rather than use software that drains as much battery and money as possible, instead of actually playing music files for you. Alternatively, you could use YouTube Music on a web browser and just switch your [[adblock]]er on... but then again, YouTube Music has horrible audio quality as well.

Creation

This faggot is making more money every day while [[you
This faggot is making more money every day while [[you
remain an unemployed neet.]]

The main person responsible for developing this abomination was a [[faggot]] called Daniel Ek, who also worked on the [[uTorrent|µTorrent]] project before he began to develop Spotify. He dropped out of college and opened an advertising company (note this guy's passion for ads) called Advertigo, but he has such a strong [[fetish]] for [[money]] that he sold it in [[2006]] to another company. There was also a guy named Martin Lorentzo, but nobody really cares about him.

Other services

Spotify's unoriginal logo.
Spotify's unoriginal logo.

Spotify for Podcasters


Spotify for Shitcasters is just a version of Spotify designed so that retards can pick up a microphone and say whatever the fuck they want and get other retards to listen to them. No more than 20 people use this shit. The only reason podcasts still exist on Spotify is because [[Joe Rogan]] uses it.

Spotify for Artists


Spotify for [[Autists]] is a version of Spotify for the people that believe they have a good singing voice, or those that produce their own shitty songs to publish in the Spotify library. In general, nobody uses this shit either, especially when better alternatives like [[Soundcloud]] exist.

Gallery

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See also

*[[Music]]
*[[Audiophile]]
*[[Soulseek]]
*[[Bandcamp]]
*[[Napster]]
*[[Ear Rape]]
*[[Limewire]]
*[[Last.FM]]

External Links

*
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*https://www.winamp.com/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Install this instead.

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[[Encyclopedia Dramatica:Article of the Now|Preceded]] by
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|[[Elon Musk]]}}

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