MySpace Trolls

Page ID: 15050 Last updated: 10 years ago Namespace: 0

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MySpace Trolls (the term is used loosely) spend nearly all their time spamming [[MySpace]] groups, user profiles, and engaging in epic ineffectual faggotry whilst whining incessantly about whatever drama-laden fucktardery wafted their way on any given day. They come from a variety of backgrounds, locations, and lifestyles, but tend to engage exclusively in ineffective [[SSP|glory-troll]] [[circle jerk]]s no one gives a shit about in the first place. Tandem that exists is usually typified by the [[namefags|self-proclaimed]] who have trouble getting anything done. Wins being few and far between as the majority spend their skiddie-days searching for their next e-peen extension whilst managing to fag up the MySpace wasteland with more [[USI]] than there already is.

Recently, many of the trolls have [[GTFO|moved]] to [[Facebook]].

What They Do

Some dipshit flooding a group.
Some dipshit flooding a group.

Spam groups and troll [[16 year old girl|16 year old]] emos. That's pretty much it. They "target" shitty Myspace groups, ie. bodybuilding groups, [[gay]] groups, [[Wicca]]n groups, and groups for [[sick fuck]]s. [[Sockpuppet]]s are common for r[[AIDS]], and almost always get deleted by the watchful eyes of the [[internet police]] or some sort of [[internet humanitarian]].

Some [[Not really|Notable]] Myspace Failures




Jack Moá´™mon


Known for playing the fool there's some confusion as to if he's really trolling, or just flat out retarded. Jack spends hours arguing nonsensical points about topics that nobody could give two shits about. Formerly known as Funky Fungi which is in fact a truly fitting name as his greasy bowl cut hair gives him the striking resemblance of fungus, Jack is a severe drug addict who desperately tries to justify his abuse to anyone who will listen and even those that won't. Abusing everything from weed and psychedelics to bum shit like cough syrup and Jenkem he truly is a sad and worthless being.

Brian THE KING Blazejack (cybergecko)


Blazejack is the fucking man, he currently lives on mount Everest fucking mad bitches and smoking opium. Brian is a GOD TIER troll who reels in more pussy then a tuna fish. I think he even fucked my mom one time and I'm ok with that because brian is mystical wizard. Blazejack often makes Sarj cry himself to sleep with his cats who are the only ones who love him.

Devil's Bitch


[[Danielspengies
[[Danielspengies
and Devil's Bitch are currently feuding.]]
[[IRL]], she's a 26-year-old former [[whore|hooker]] named Kelly Winters from [[Canadia]]. [[OTI]], she is the queen of MySpace trolls. Her trolling often involves sexy defaults, using sockpuppets and [[flame]]s. It is rumored that she stopped spamming over a year ago because her brain just couldn't comprehend the complexities of holding down the enter key for hours at a time. She was in a relationship with a former troll known as [[drugs|DLH]], who feigned his own death to temporarily [[GTFO]] the trolling community. He has now returned, but really, no one cares.

Recently, Devil's Bitch went into retirement from pretending-to-troll-but-sucking-miserably so she could try to stop [[fail]]ing at parenting. This hiatus is expected to last [[less than three]] days. Now a days Devil's Bitch hangs around facebook complianing about her sex life. (which contians drug addicts, and sex offenders)Recently she fucked 10 guys but is butthurt because she found out her BF (TEXAN) cheated on her.

Devil's Bitch legally changed her name to Rain Stevens and runs a shitty facebook group called trollhouse where all the faggots who still don't have a life after 10 years suck each others dicks on the internet. Rain still whores occasionally for cigarettes and anal lube.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1443547814" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Facebook

DLH

DLH is the king of trolls, and has been [[Lemonparty|around for a long time]]. His trolling has deteriorated over time, to the point of basic sockpuppet spamming.

Some argue he has completed [[CSIII]], but most agree that he is black person. Can't say much about him. He's just there.

[[Theoneandonlysarj]]


Tyler's [[sockpuppet
Tyler's [[sockpuppet
showing Sarj how it's done.]]
Sarj's (aka Patrick Bennett) trolling normally involves [[TL;DW]] YouTube videos all of 6 people watch and "[[spamming]]" of weak flames. He even uses an automated program to do it so he can crank out even [[moar]] fail. [[Lie|Sarj has a life]]. Most recently, Sarj got [[butthurt]] by Protoman of the MegaMafia when he made fun of Sarj's curved dick. After losing 80 pounds, now he thinks he's hot shit, showing off his flap to over weight single moms and divorced wives on failbook. After losing weight and becoming a big shot he was accused of raping some anorexic bitch named tamara. After many many year of "trolling" sarj has now moved to canada is continues to be a big fucking loser on the internet after gaining back the 80lbs mentioned eariler.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=552800861" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Facebook

[[Buy a dog|Cujo]]

Cujo asking for [[buttsecks
Cujo asking for [[buttsecks
.]]
This guy's real name is Ron Pruett, and he is most famous for [[Larry Craig|soliciting buttsecks]] [[OTI]], and for being unable to distinguish the grammatical difference between the present and past tense of the word "sale." He has also admitted to, in no particular order, being extremely racist, being too fucktarded to realize he's extremely racist, cheating on his taxes, and trying to mix up random drugs in his sink under the guise of "making LSD."

He's currently married to Failor Fails, aka Rachel, who is suspected of having mild [[Assburgers|downs syndrome]]. After knocking up miss down syndrome he then knocked her out and got kicked the fuck out and is now a lonely loser again. Cujo often takes pleasure in masturbating to suicide videos.

[[13-year-old boy|The Punisher of the New Breed of Hate]]

The Punisher of the New Breed of Hate is a 17-year-old [[pro-ana]] [[emo]] [[juggalo]] with [[Asperger's Syndrome]] named Joshua Frances Niebrzydowski (more liek black personzydowski, [[amirite]]??). If that and the cheesy name didn't tell you enough, this guy's best trolling attacks were along the lines of "[[fail|you're gay]]" and "[[NO U]]". [[Mission: MySpace]] and a few of his fellow internet humanitarians contacted Niggerzydowski's school and threatened him with a [[lolsuit]]. [[Serious business|Even the FBI was brought in]]. The kid literally [[shit]] his pants and almost got 2 years in prison for spamming and trolling MySpace forums, not to mention being [[banned]] from the [[internets]] at school.

[[Trying too hard|The Rest of the New Breed of Hate]]

Nobody knows how many of these [[fucktard]]s there are, but they [[fail]] miserably at everything they do (if the name didn't already give that away). Their "trolling" often consists of posting [[shit]] such as "BOW DOWN TO THE (PROFILE NAME) OF THE NEW BREED OF HATE". They have masqueraded as wrestlers, [[furry|animals]], and recently, even as a [[shemale]]. They often spam groups and can't come up with a simple [[inane flame]]. Not even [[NO U]].

[[Irish|McKelley]]

He doesn't really troll much anymore, however, he gets baleeted for posting [[n00dz]], and for being friends with the trolls.

[[The Matrix|Mr. Smith]]

[[Butthurt
[[Butthurt
after being deleted, Mr. Smith screams [[fursecution]].]]
This profile is disguised as a dog with an [[image macro]] stolen from [[ED]]. Many trolls use this alias, and share the profile for their raids.

[[Fail|The Rejected Prodigy]]

This guy's real name is Alex, and, despite his constant [[Bible]] preaching as a troll, it is suspected that he is an [[atheist]] due to his [[neckbeard]]. He's responsible for the card-like image of Devil's Bitch, and does a lot of [[Photoshop]] work. He is also known as a wigger, due to his shitty rap video. He has recently declared a war on [[Wicca]] after MySpace announced that they were considering removing "Wiccan" from the list of [[religion]]s you could set on your profile, thus making the Wiccans already feel [[butthurt]] and somewhat [[fursecution|perscuted]]. He now spends his time mainly having [[cyber sex]] with Devil's Bitch. She said it was the best lay she ever had, even compared to real life. Also he joined (the crew)a youtube gain on failtube after relising he was a failtroll all along. Leading by a midget clown named Trippy, (a Clown that just shits and drinks all day.) The Rejected Prodigy considers himself the father of [[Trolldin|Trollianity]], and made [[shit no one cares about|the trolling Bible]].

[[Britfag|Sir William McTavish]]

This guy likes starting [[flame war]]s and moderates troll groups. He often goes after [[religious]] groups, and has been known to show cock.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1255925257" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=616452664" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">His Real Facebook

[[Emo|Cutter]] black person

Cutter may be a mole, not a troll. Screencap from M:MS.
Cutter may be a mole, not a troll. Screencap from M:MS.

[[Some argue]] this is a Sarj sockpuppet, but its posting style suggests otherwise. Which was later proved wrong. He's actually a fat red neck who tries to get laid with random Troll whores on facebook. It posts [[hate]] speech, uses proper grammar, and is generally less [[infantilism|infantile]] in its demeanor. Just recently Cutter went to New york to meet Jj Spicowitts just so she can reject him after seeing that he was a fat middle age man who was having a middle age crisis. [[DRTISC|Retired as of 2009]]. cutter now know as Rob is still "trolling" on facebook in rains Trollhouse group. Rob is a giant faggot who is understand because he constantly has a mouth full of cum. Rob often masturbates to rains whore vagina.

[[Basement-dweller|Auntie Social]]

Auntie Social is a [[No women on the internet|female troll]] who is best known for starting [[flame war]]s. [[Some argue]] she is a [[transsexual]] or at least a member of [[pantykin.com]] based on her profile picture, but he/she consistently denies this.

[[Azn|Wan-Dum Fuk]]

This trorr hass exremery good [[Engrish]] and awrays uses [[caps lock]]. He normurry gets into frame wars in frorums and uses the phrase "[[Britain|No Tudor!]]" Is a reference to a Scott & Todd prank carr of the same name. (Thanks for that, Wan-Dum.) His pictua is the [[O RLY?]] owr. He is a skirred frame warria and insurts [[America]] [[at least 100|at rist wan hunred]] times per account. He's a crossbrid of a trorr and an [[internet tough guy|irrerret tough gai]].

[[Cancer|It's Not a Tumor!!!1]]

Tumor, butthurt after getting [[pwn
Tumor, butthurt after getting [[pwn
ed. Screencap from M:MS.]]
This dude lives in [[Georgia]] and has the [[IQ]] of the [[less than three|average Georgian]]. He hates [[Mission: MySpace]] and gets extremely butthurt whenever he gets deleted for flashing his penis in various groups. The only thing notable about this guy is that he uses his real profile to troll - the same profile he uses for [[pedophilia|legitimate]] [[rape|uses]] [[face-painter|of]] [[CP|MySpace]].

[[Indian|Danny]]

Danny Hemachandra, a resident of [[Seattle]] and trolls the bodybuilding group as well as [[gay]] groups and posts links to [[shock site]]s. It has recently been discovered that Danny is in fact a [[homosexual]], since he has openly admitted to enjoying [[buttsecks|Brokeback Mountain]] on his personal profile.

[[Star Wars|Rogue]]

Troll [[tits]]. She bitches about getting baleeted because she associates with the trolls, though she never actually trolls.

Lord Clean

Lord Clean.
Lord Clean.

He used to be the best troll out there on MySpace, that is, until Rob told MySpace to [[pwn]] him. Butthurt, he threw away a few final sockpuppet profiles before [[Ragequit|quitting MySpace]].

[[Eproctophilia|Yucko]]

A troll in diguise as a clown. Often claims to be [[dead]] or [[Jesus|undead]]. Not very persistent, just a minor nuisance. He is likely a [[13-year-old boy]] due to his lack of maturity.

Ricky

This guy pretends to be a [[ninja]] but is a [[typical]] basement-dwelling [[atheist]] [[fucktard]]. His insults are [[inane flame]]s at best and he was outed as an IRL [[pedo]] for hitting on some other troll's 16-year-old [[sock]] account. Based on his default picture, it is likely that he is also some sort of [[cosplay]] fucktard. A [[n00b]] at trolling, and he has shown no evidence of improving his technique.

Recently Ricky admitted to being a virgin at 24, providing further evidence to the idea that he likes to touch 8-year-olds in their no-nos.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=694105425" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Facebook

Kain

After seeing one of Danielspengies' nude shots, Kain just can't contain himself.
After seeing one of Danielspengies' nude shots, Kain just can't contain himself.

One of the original myspace trolls, Kain, whose real name is Daniel William Wharton, claimed to be hot [[shit]] while simultaneously showing no ability to form coherent sentences, use proper [[grammar]], or utilize any form of [[logic]]. After being constantly challenged and [[pwn]]ed by Sarj, Kain decided to [[GTFO]] when Danielspengies discovered one of Kain's jaded ex-girlfriends. Soon after, pictures of Kain weeping in [[lulzy]] [[emo]]-like fashion were posted, and audio clips of him crying like a [[adult baby|baby]] were unearthed. To this day, Kain refuses to show his face on MySpace, and instead curls up in a little ball at night, trying to pretend nothing ever happened. It is rumored he is a former member of [[NAMBLA|Menudo]].

Tyler

This guy is disguised as a [[13-year-old boy|13-year-old]] [[wigger]], and his trolling style mimics his e-[[fursona]]. He often posts regarding [[drugs]], though the [[retard]] in his default picture obviously has no need for drugs as his reality is clearly fucked up enough as is.

[[Cunt|Michelle]]

Michelle is constantly [[butthurt]]. Her [[vagoo|meat curtains]] are spread wider than [[goatse]], yet somehow she still thinks she's [[hawt]] shit. She has been driven off both facebook and myspace multiple times by danielspengies, who is currently claiming that he has a list of her relative's docs, and is not afraid to contact them all about how badly Michelle's vagina reportedly smells.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=624333646" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Michelle's Facebook

[[Fail|Megamafia]]

The Megamafia is a gang of [[Megaman]] character trolls. They are suspected of being one guy with [[sockpuppet|multiple accounts]], due to not having a life. They are shitty trolls because Megaman was a shitty game. Their method of trolling is an ultimate failtroll method of threadbombing any attempt of discussing anything but megaman which usually fails because anyone with firefox knows how to get around that. They're also fucktards who think everything is a [[ripoff]] of Megaman. They prove this not by using logic, but by posting shitty pics that were most likely made in KidPix. Basically, these guys are idiots who equate [[spamming]] with [[lulz]], or flooding topics with [[shock image]]s.

Misti

Fairly new to the myspace troll world, Misti is the result of 16 years of meth use and horrid stupdiity. This description fits her perfectly, because Misti admitted to danielspengies that she started using drugs at the age of 12, and, as a result, ended up losing her first two kids to the state of california.

Not content to be an utter deadbeat failure in real life, Misti often teams with michelle to chew cyber cud, get defensive, and otherwise throw out unfunny flames as an attempt to cover up months of [[butthurt]].

Since April of 2007, Misti has whored herself to various MySpacers [[IRL]], including Tyler, and is currently working on getting the entire Megamafia to run a [[Mantrain|train]] on her.

Others

Hasidic Jew, [[Retard|Smartass]] [[Wigger|Whiteboy]], and others (mostly [[fat]] [[women|wimmins]]) are frequently seen in troll groups, however, they are not [[notable]] enough to warrant their own sections.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1581302200" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Hasidic Jew's Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1442345271" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Smartass Whiteboy's Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1303482269" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Lisa's Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=642646718" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Tamara's Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=743855621" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Cheryl/"Cheese"'s Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1014591954" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Toes 'R' Us' Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=628704142" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">BoraXiN's Facebook

The Moles

Danielspengies often goes after other trolls.
Danielspengies often goes after other trolls.

Of course, there are trolls (or people outside the troll community who [[bullshit|happen to be in the same groups the trolls are]]) who report their friends to MySpace for [[bulling is rabbit|cyberbullying]] during intense fits of [[troll's remorse]]. For n00dz, see the [[gay]]llery.

[[Mission: MySpace]]

A butthurt Niggerzydowski after a bunch of profiles got baleeted. Screencap from M:MS.
A butthurt Niggerzydowski after a bunch of profiles got baleeted. Screencap from M:MS.

Rob causing [[moar
Rob causing [[moar
butthurt.]]
[[Fact|This guy is a troll in disguise]] as a [[homosexual]] [[internet humanitarian]]. His act has gone unchecked because MySpace loves internet humanitarians and [[white knighting|anyone who tries to help them out]]. Danielspengies and Pure Hatred figured him out as a troll, but Rob denied it (just like his sexuality) and decided to [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|kill 50 troll profiles in one day]] as retribution. This event caused epic [[butthurt]] among the trolls. In August, Rob posed as someone named Chase Colborn, with a [[shoop]]ed sign picture to [[fake|verify his identity]]. "Chase" managed to [[pwn]] 37 troll profiles in one day. Rob gave up the act and turned to [[lulz|the dark side]]. He is now organizing troll "raids" on groups, primarily [[secks]]-related ones. However, he is still [[Republican|in the closet]].

===[[Danielspengies]]===
There once was a whale who thought he was a pirate, but nothing more then a fail whale. This is a tale about a whale named Danielspengies, and how his failure goes down in lulz history. He dresses like a pirate on youtube, but fails miserably, looking like a huge gay virgin. His marriage is on the rocks, he can't get a job or go to school because he has [[Bipolar disorder|bipolar]] problem. He joined Facebook to try and bring down Devil's Bitch's account due to butthurt. He failed at his attempt when he found out Rain wasn't Rain the entire time. Devil's Bitch's real name is Kelly Winters, and he flipped when he found out that The Rejected Prodigy was possibly related to her.

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[[Jude's Army]]

[[Theoneandonlysarj
[[Theoneandonlysarj
offering to [[face-painter|paint]] [[Jude's Army]]'s pictures.]]
Sarj and The Id in a [[flame war
Sarj and The Id in a [[flame war
.]]
The flames continue...
The flames continue...

The fighting escalates.
The fighting escalates.

Though she was really a fake, she managed to go undercover into some troll groups, only to report them. She was equally hated as Rob/Mission: MySpace among the trolls, though she stopped reporting as many toward the end of her "career".

[[SSP|Drama]]

Since getting deleted every week isn't [[lulz]]y enough, the trolls start up drama amongst themselves, or among other users. Before he went almost out of the picture to focus on his gay porn career, Mission: MySpace was the source of most of the drama, with message and group flooding, as well as the constant threat of being deleted every day. For trolls, this was entertaining, and even became a game - who would survive the internet humanitarian hunts the longest. However, the troll hunting stopped almost entirely when [[Jude's Army]] was revealed as a fake.

[[Shit nobody cares about|How it starts]]


Inter-troll drama starts include whenever a troll gets deleted or when a troll group gets [[rape]]d. The trolls who get deleted try to figure out who got them deleted, but it always devolves into a tangled mess of [[NO U]]s.

Gallery

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See Also

* [[Shameless self-promotion]]
* [[Trying too hard]]
* [[Chronic Troll Syndrome]]
* [[Internet troll personality disorder]]
* [[Anti-Emo Federation]]
* [[Da Myspace Niggaz]]
* [[Epic fail]]
* [[Ruining the internet]]
* [[Jason Aula]]

External Links

Somebody keep the fucking groups up to date kthx.
*http://www.myspace.com/dannyhemachandra" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Danny's real profile


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[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Myspace]]

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