Tumblr

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tumblr (AKA dumblr) is [[4chan]]'s [[retarded]] [[16-year-old girl|14-year-old]] [[Incest|sister/rape victim]]. It is a mainstream website that preaches the concept of needlessly minimizing the vowels in words, and it was created, perhaps, for [[blogging]]. While its original purpose has long since been forgotten, its present application is apparent: to provide a [[circlejerk]] space for every [[hipster]], [[16-year-old girl]], and [[Indie]] [[artfag]] to post their favorite stolen photographs and pieces of [[DeviantART|mediocre art]], [[Trying too hard|"meaningful"]] subtitled stills or [[gif]] collages from pretentious popular [[movies|films]], as well as [[wolfaboo|talking about how cool wolves]] are, all within a cesspool of self-congratulatory victim-hood. In short, tumblr consists of boring and vulnerable, boy crazy high school girls that wish they were someone else and the [[Pussy|sensitive]] guys who ultimately win them over by posting desaturated Polaroids of their meticulously decorated bedrooms. Generally speaking, tumblr is the Internet's biggest [[hugbox]]. It doesn't matter what you post, as long as it's "progressive" some bleeding asshole will reblog it and jerk you off.

tumblr's population consists solely of only the coolest and most trendy kids in your nearest suburb or recently gentrified urban avenue, as well as talented 15-year-old photographers, poets and writers. If the Internet had property for its users to virtually [[Habbo Hotel|dwell]] in, tumblr would be the gentrified neighborhood full of studio apartments, paid for by [[mom]] and [[dad]]. tumblr users probably want to go to art school to study painting, and likely will get in with enough hard work. But, alas, they are likely to drop out after discovering that reposting images on the Internet didn't magically give them talent.

tumblr is known for its high population of newfags who steal memes and claim them as their own and say that they "invented" them. What tumblr fags don't realize, is that all of these memes should have been forgotten [[last Thursday]], and no one finds them funny, or even slightly humorous anymore. Most of the comics posted on tumblr contain all of these memes in every fucking panel because these so called "artists" can be bothered to draw the fucking faces themselves, but what the still don't realize is that using the punchline in every fucking panel kills the whole joke. They basically take something shitty, make it even shittier, and then share it with the world, and they all obsess over it like a bunch of fags.

Concept

]]

tumblr is based around effortlessly sharing everything, no matter how pointless, boring, or cliche it is. tumblr also doesn't take into account that the data you're posting may belong to someone else, so its users are free to take and repost another person's work with ease, most often [[Copyright Infringement|without citing]] any source or author without punishment. However, since the website is run by Jews, those little technicalities are panned over.

tumblr allows its users to follow other users, which places their posts on their dashboard. The more users and Followers that "[[like]]" and repost your [[bullshit]] posts, the higher your "tumblarity" will become. Having a large amount of followers will most often result in the user sticking their head up their ass and believing that they truly have mad skills. With tumblarity, tumblr essentially becomes the high school of the Internet; people with the highest Tumblarity are rewarded with their blogs being named the most popular. Thus, the blog becomes not so much about blogging at all, but about how much people "like" the "cool" stuff you post - a mere popularity contest. The original concept of blogging in general is more or less lost when users become disillusioned from the original purpose of their blogging, and become more concerned with the number of people who "like" the beige picture of someone's feet that they posted.

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History

tumblr was created in 2007 by an obvious [[Jew]] named David Karp, initially funded by his earnings as a software consultant for a parenting website. After cajoling his userbase into throwing away their money into his wallet (AKA: fundraising), he had over $5 million dollars to help fund his website dedicated to hosting 200kb, low contrast pictures of anonymous people's belly buttons. To get an idea of the man Karp is, note that he gladly revoked the name of a random user and handed it over to Pitchfork media arguably for Indie cred.

His own tumblr, found https://www.davidslog.com/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">here, hosts not only his massive popularity, but also randoms instances from his every day life, for all of his fans to read daily.

A few examples of the former would be the follow:

The Users

The average tumblr user is a white, [[Bullshit|well liked]], [[Sarcasm|interesting person to hang out with]] and mentally ill loser who is obsessed with Social Justice which makes them a pain to be around because they won't shut the fuck up about trivial shit [[IRL]]. Once they start Tumblogging they become selfish hipsters that constantly complain about having no friends, no supporting family members and [[Forever Alone|no love life]] because they think this will get people to "support" them by giving them asspats and follows. Becoming the ultimate hipsters of the Internet, they reject anything they think as "mainstream" and "popular", because they're all [[aspie|exceptional individuals]].

The usual thing you'll see from a tumblr user is the post "Ask Me Something via My ask Box". DON'T FALL FOR IT! Most users who say this have serious cases of [[USI]] and aren't aware that most sane people have better things to do than ask a random person a dumb question that will most likely be answered in the most unintelligent way. If you do ever fall for it, make sure they have 'anonymous' turned on so that you can tell them something offensive. They'll most likely respond with sarcasm or with [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|"I'm too cool for this shit,"]] which forces their followers to become [[white knights]] and flood them with "Don't listen to that anon! You're awesome and have my full permission to use me as your personal army!"

About 99.8% of the time, someone follows another person without liking a single one of their posts. They only do this in hopes of getting more followers themselves. Following the follower back only solidifies how much of a loser the followed one is (probably because they want to hold on to the idea that someone actually cares about the lame shit that they post). 0.1% of the time that someone follows another is because the follower thinks the followed is cute and wants to fap to the followed's GPOY's. the other 0.1% is actually someone who cares and they're usually a friend IRL or a family member.

tumblr users LOVE to fuck around with genders and sexuality, due to most of them being hormone filled teenagers. They have a manic obsession with gender identity that they use to describe their appreciation of gay porn as some kind of "activism". Their fetish for transgender and sexually confused people, originating from a deep insecurity and self conciousness that is their reason for frequenting tumblr in the first place, has created many lulzy moments for the interwebs over the last few years. For maximum trolling potential, tell them that gender is a biological factor determined by physical bodies and genitalia, and not how someone perceives themselves, that physically there's only 2 of them, and that they confuse the concept of gender with sexuality.

tumblr users and "socializing"

Some tumblr users view it as a great place to socialize with friends in groups. This is as good an idea as trying to date someone from 4chan's /b/.

tumblr users HATE when their own friends follow them, which is a peculiar thing. Mainly because all they ever do is rage and bitch about people they know IRL and outside of tumblr which might eventually destroy friendships or relationships and expose how horribly shallow and moronic most tumblr users really are. Despite this, people still think tumblr is still a great place to meet and socialize with friends on tumblr, and by "friends" we mean balding 20-something-year-old [[Basement Dweller|welfare leeches]] who are just looking for some ass under a largely-anonymous user name.

[[MSPaint Adventures|Homestuck]] fangirls

tumblr has a large population of Homestuck fantards. Typical Homestuck fantards are [[16-year-old girl]]s who pretend to be lesbians or bisexuals (or some other unheard of sexual orientation) to get followers. Another chunk of them draw [[My Little Pony]] porn for all their autistic brony followers, or make shitty RPs with their friends. They also tend to have SUP3R NUMB3R C@PZL0CK SP311ING SKI11S or nonexistent spelling skills at all despite being straight A honor roll students. They're easy to troll and spot based on their Homestuck, anime, Pony, or "artistic" avatar. Best way to deal with them is to hate Homestuck, guaranteed lulz from the butthurt fantards. Warning: the majority of Homestuck fantards on Dumblr tend to suffer from Assburgers or [[GOTIS]].

Need an example? https://gallusrostromegalus.tumblr.com/aboutthechicken" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Here you go. Said agender freak has been attacked in the past for telling bullshit "stories" and passing them off as true-life heartwarming fables. Otherwise she/he/it checks off Tumblr-trigger-word boxes like a machine. Could be an AI for all we know. If real, must be difficult to think up and write "original material" for a blog when taking 40 different medications. If this isn't persuasive enough, consider the

and the https://archiveofourown.org/users/GallusRostromegalus" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">crappy [[Star Wars] fanfiction]. Migrating https://www.deviantart.com/gallusrostromegalus/status-update/15563054" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">over from Tumblr possibly because "people were rude to me". Or for no reason.

The dickbirds of [[Metafilter]] https://www.metafilter.com/177977/A-Short-List-of-Shenanigans-My-Parents-Dog-Has-Engaged-In" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">love Gallus bigtime.

Retarded [[hipster]]-wannabe [[16-year-old girl]]s

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that suffers from [[wigger]] syndrome: ]]

A new breed of 16-year-old girls has surfaced, in an apparent attempt to protest and whore attention away from typical [[Snapchat]] 16-year-old girls who are obviously at least 100 times hotter. Th...is new breed is 40% indie(and trying to pretend they don't listen to Linkin Park and Paramore), 30% deformed, 20% idiot, and 10% unrealistic expectations wrapped together with the same desperate whoring that is the fiber of 16-year-old girls. Expect these girls to have a tumblr in which they spam pro-ana photography of girls they so desperately wish to be, post the most recent indie (overrated) tunes such as Radiohead, MGMT, Arcade Fire and Sigur Ros, and love weed because they're progressive and liberal. They also claim to love reading despite only reading Harry Potter and whore on about how HP is better than Twilight and Joseph Gorden Levitt is better than Robert Pattison. The majority of what comes out of the mouths include whining about getting a new job, looking for that special someone and telling people about what they ate today.

First, they'll tell you how much they love the pointless, pretentious, nonsensical, and edgy mind-fuck movie they just watched. They'll also bring up whatever shitty band was just on TV. Then they'll try to discuss philosophy without having ever studied philosophy but maybe just Wikipedia'd Sartre and found it too hard to finish and precede to bastardize Sartre by posting only quotes by him pertaining to love and dying alone. Maybe with some deep and edgy Nietschze quotes thrown in for good measure. Then they'll show you pictures of their scratched up Crosely vinyl record collection, full of shitty mainstream "indie" artists such as lana del rey or Halsey. Despite being exactly identical in personality, let alone their physical appearance, they believe themselves to be hot unique hipster shit. They also believe themselves omnipotent super chicks incapable of error and will argue with you if you disagree with them and respond with "This is my life who are yous to say what I can't or not can do leave me alone haters(:!!!".

Extremely vulnerable and stupid, pretending to be a geeky boy who plays in a band and likes the same shitty music is the easiest way to squeeze out nudes from these chicks. Be warned, at least 100% are average and deformed.

In a somewhat unsurprising new trend, many of these underage teenagers now see it "hip" and "cool" to be interested in SciFi films and TV shows. Something that only 5 years ago would get omegas bullied to death in high school. Despite knowing 0 knowledge about the back-story behind any of the works that they are reading, these 16-year-old girls will often pose as though they understand it deeply. They don't. Pretending to support this new trend is a 101 to dating 16-year-old girls over the Internet for omegas, even though in reality it increases your chances of getting laid in real life by exactly 0%

[[Azn|Asians]]

Herds of Asian have been swarming tumblr. Their blogs (typically titled with doublee letterss and an obnoxious phrase about themselves) consist of thought-inducing photoshopped pictures with unrelated quotes on them, angled webcam pictures of themselves and other ugly Asian tumblr users, and bawww posts about how much they hate their high expectations asian parents. Most of them are filled with azn pride, but everyone knows they're really a bunch of wannabe-black assfucks. Every now and then, they'll post about a recent break-up, complete with a photo/video of their fugly crying faces. Both male and female users do this, proving that they're all a bunch of fags. The asian guys pretend to be [[nigger|gangstas]] despite planning to become [[engineers]] after they graduate high school. The asian girls post about their favorite azn dramas, obnoxious k-pop boy/girl bands, pictures of desserts and bubble tea, and seemingly somehow still manage to get a 4.0 GPA despite the fact they can't form complete sentences and fail math. Both genders will have "Like a G6" by the Far East Movement on [[autoplay]].

[[Nigger|Black Tumblr]]

By far the most cancerous part of tumblr, black tumblr. Consists of [[white guilt]] suffering 14 year old girls, [[black lives matter]] fags, [[pseudo-intellectual]] [[niggers]] that dropped out of high school in 10th thinking they're an expert on everything, and [[WE WUZ KINGZ AN SHEIT]] niggers wanting those evil [[white devils]] to compensate for enslaving their lazy nigger asses. They'll bitch about everything and turn everything into a race issue. Black Tumblr is also known for being [[Retard|"Woke"]], which is believing every conspiracy theory brought to you, thinking cops are all trigger happy racists, and that white people are keeping niggers down, all while collecting welfare and unemployement checks since their middle school education failed to land them a job at [[McDonald's]]. They easily fall for bait and can't think for themselves. Also known for their overusage of gif images featuring niggers from Real Housewives, reality TV shows, and Nicki Minaj.

[[Erik Rhodes]]

[[90 Day Jane]] type later started shooting roids and dropping drugs, then got a tumblr and became one of its most mocked users. Forgot to cover the gender-fluid and psychiatric alphabet soup angle.

[[Tumbears]]

What [[you]] fap to.

[[Social Justice]] bloggers

To some people, the best way to [[win]] at tumblr is to be the most oppressed, discriminated against person with the shittiest life in the world. A great way of doing this is to be a minority.

Be sure to plaster all manner of stamps, stickers, memes and macros all over your tumblr to advertise your minority-of-choice and how positive you are about them, but only ever mention the negative things about being one. This is sure to endear you to all the Social Justice bloggers who will forever be walking on eggshells around you and treating you like the [[Special Snowflake Syndrome|special snowflake]] that you are, after all, you people get [[offended]] so easily. Like the majority of tumblr users, they will often reblog with a bunch of [[Unfunny|animated gifs]] to cover their own [[butthurt]].

tumblr slang

*GPOY: Gratuitous Picture Of Yourself. Often used on pictures to express that it's you and whoever looks at the picture should receive a resemblance of you in it's entirety.

* Topless Tuesdays: [[Attention whore]]s trying to solve their daddy issues.

*THIS: The word "this" is to describe the picture or comment that the typer believes to be the one and only true picture to ever be s0per kewl and I don't even because oh my GaGa ...THIS^^^ ..

*Ukulele: It's an instrument, however, this word is used to cover up that the person who claims to have one, and to be an exceptionally good player, is actually trying to mirror an image that they are talented because, seriously, who plays a fucking Ukulele and thinks they're hot shit?

*Meme: Anything with a picture and words on it.

*5T4S: Meaning that if you know what it means then you deserve to know. In reality it was a bunch of fucktwats who believed there should be separation of people who stumbled across tumblr and of those who made a tumblr because of [[MTV]]. Except for this whole Jewish holocaust that would've happened, tumblr turned on itself and anyone claiming 5t4s now is declared a fat cunt.

*There's more in https://www.dailydot.com/society/sincere-guide-tumblr-slang/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">this DailyDot article. Obtain bucket before reading.

Gender and sexual orientation

from a [[Spongebob Squarepants]] meme.

tumblr's content

*Thinspo. Every 16-year-old girl is guaranteed to have [[at least 100]] pictures of skinny models wearing sundresses or half naked on her blog representing not only her Indie [[fashion]] love (she doesn't know shit about fashion; she just likes vintage filters) but also her desperate insecurity about her "average" looks.

*Pictures of couples in luv 4 eva Every teenager on tumblr will have pictures of indie/scene couples kissing or in a sweet compromising position to express their sensitivity and heartache. Expect the couple to have their faces covered or cut out and heavily photoshopped because they're ugly.

*Homestuck Almost as common as My Little Pony, Homestuck has a very large presence on tumblr. Typical Homestuck fantards on tumblr are usually [[faggot|gay losers]] or [[lesbian|lesbians]] doing nothing but posting shitty artwork and getting in shitty RPs. A good chunk of them are also SJWs that think everything is racist, sexist, and against them. They have a persecution complex bigger than bronies.

*Food Out of all things you can photoshop, food has got to be the most ridiculously meticulous and detailed. Hipsters will go ape shit for a cup of yogurt on a floral pattern cloth angled and shot with a Nikon/Canon then photoshopped and filtered with fake bokehs. You will even see it happening with fucking [[KFC]], just remember to to include a green background because it's "complimentary to the red". 40k a year art school and that's what they have to show for it.

*Harry Potter tumblr is infested with teenagers who think themselves to be so special just because they dislike [[Twilight]] and love [[Harry Potter]]. They claim to LOVE reading, but we all know that is a huge lie. The only things they HAVE read are Harry Potter and the responses to their reblogs. They claim to love books and constantly post fashion pics of indie girls reading books, but in reality they organize their bookshelf by color and size and only watched the movies because reading hurts for them.

*Quotes Get a picture of space or the stars(or a movie or tv show), put a photoshop filter on it, some triangles, then use Helvetica and put some quote on it and wait for your [[over 9000]] followers

*Movies Every movie screencap/gifs on tumblr is either Mean Girls, the Virgin Suicides, Inception, or the Avengers (and it's always of the whiny bitch, Loki). Like quotes, they love to slap their name on "their" sets like they really put any effort posting screencaps/gifs to their page.

*Role-Playing Role-playing groups on tumblr have also taken the welfare-dependent shut-in crowd by storm.

*Indie music tumblr loves shitty [[hipster]] bands like [[Prep|Vampire Weekend]], [[Goofy|Mac Demarco]], The 1975, or any other band with a skinny effeminate barista singing in a faux British accent.

*Newfag shit tumblr is the reason there aren't any real memes anymore.

*LGBT+ Half of tumblr users and acts like a big mafia; say one little opinion about them (mostly the Trannies and Lesbians) and they'll come after you in mobs telling you to gtfo and to kys. Love to abuse the words, "homophobic and transphobic" for every little thing and or people calling out their bullshit. Just sitting around taking about how Gay/Queer/Lesbian/Trans/Ace they are and how they're "better" than "cis" people(even thou, they forgot that "cis" people gave birth to them and the world). Loves to "headcanon/AU" everything from fiction, t.v, and movie characters (even inanimate objects) as Gay/Lesbian/Queer/Trans(even if canon character(s) are straight) and or one of the many made up genders because "MUH REPRESENTATION!!". Bitch on their tumblr when they do get it and cries because its "not good enough" for them. Half of them are posers just so they can get their rocks off of making Gay/Lesbian parings and for attention and money. Good chunk of these faggots praise just about any mediocre/shit stuff like Steven Universe, Rupaul's Drag Race, etc for LGBTWXYZ shit because they "need" to show kids/the world it ok to be a giant faggot who will hate themselves and other problems and will then kill themselves soon enough because of it.

*My little pony Ever since the explosion of [[bronies]], tumblr is now the central hub for pony [[rule 34]] and more [[mary sue]] stupidity. Most of them includes ask boxes that is normally filled with people asking the ponyfag to have [[sex]] with them.

*Porn At least half the content of tumblr is porn, which the tumblrites are fiercely protective of to the point they protested the takeover by [[Yahoo!]] in fear that it would all be taken away to make it "family friendly". Clearly Yahoo! realized the site was filled with the socially inept and left them to their fapping. Most porn uploaded on tumblr is in black and white, making it very hard to fap to. [[DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS|THEY BANNED PORN NOW]]! All because the Tumblr app was removed from the Apple app store due to child porn. Instead of just banning CP off the site, they banned ALL the porn and even [[Fail|tagging stuff that was non porn as porn]]. Good chunk of people [[BAW|BAWWWWW]] and left the site to other media sites that allows porn. GG Tumblr.

*Ugly British Actors tumblr is full of 16-year-old girls who think that their obsessions with homely bridge trolls like Benedict Cumberbatch and Tom Hiddleston make them SO EDGY XD, while any normal person realizes these guys are "2/10 Would Not Bang" at best. Their tumblr feeds are littered with crappy [[Sherlock|movie/TV show]] gifs and the most putrid fanfic you'll ever have the misfortune of reading. When not on the Internet, these fangirls are likely rummaging through celebrity garbage, camping outside of hotels, or trying to fight restraining orders.

*Doctor Who With the addition of Ugly British Actors comes the disturbingly large amount of Canon and Fanon posts about Doctor Who, aka that shitty and extremely overrated limey show. tumblr is literally Mecca for fans of that shit, thus making you hate it even more. Like Harry Potter, most posters are either just bandwagon fags who post in order to get followers and most likely have never seen one episode, or are nerds who think they are so unique by posting a bunch of shit fanart or cosplay.

*Cam-Whore run-off Cam whores of the [[Jessi Slaughter]] class also relish in anonymous fame via tumblr. This requires little else than posting [[Lie|"thoughtful"]] messages and [[tits|pictures of one's self.]]

*Anime When [[weeaboos]] on tumblr are not busy arguing on whether their favorite characters are [[tranny|trannies]]/mentally ill/300 moles in a suit, redrawing them as [[niggers]], or ruining their favorite shows in general, they are busy [[fap|appreciating fanart]].

*Teenaged Girls Who Shoplift: totally not making that up. Tumblr has a subculture of fucked up spoiled 15-year old girls who openly brag about stealing makeup and lingerie.

tumblr & 4chan's /b/

It's been long known that tumblr rarely produces its own original shit, so it isn't really a surprise when old rejected fail memes from [[B|/b/]] make it big on tumblr. The only problem is that tumblr users are incredibly egotistical and think they own everything that they see on their tumblr dashboard regardless of where it originally came from.

[[copypasta|If you post it,]] it immediately becomes part of [[fail|tumblr culture]], [[amiright]]?

4chan's /b/ really couldn't give a fuck where all its shit memes went to, but unfortunately for the Internet the thing /b/ hates most these days is cancerous [[newfags]]. Not only is tumblr the cancer that is killing the Internet, [[retards|tumblrfags]] actually think they deserve praise for their fail raids on Omegle and false sense of originality. The hatred brewing between these two communities could possible lead to a cyber war between tumbloggers and /b/tards that this side of the Internet has ever seen!

Newfaggotry rampant among 16-year-old girls

tumblr as of recent is full of idiots who suddenly feel like /b/ because they bitched about [[Jessi Slaughter]]. Interconnected with each other and suddenly believing themselves to be 1337 army capable of damage like [[Anonymous]], tumblr's party van consists of being covered with stars/space/forest wallpaper, triangles, running on [[weed]] and [[love]] instead of Gas, ringing Radiohead sirens, and driven by hipsters in Native American headdresses. tumblr trolling is needed ASAP in order to show them where they belong. Easy troll pickings are everywhere.

Trolling tumblr

Somewhere during the night of November 10, 2010, some [[newfags]] declared war on tumblr due to the fail [[raid]] of [[Omegle]] by tumblr. /b/ came up with Operation Overlord and reclaimed Omegle while some [[script kiddies]] tried to [[DDoS]] tumblr. No shit this plan will fail failed, seeing as tumblr runs on multiple servers and half the community are [[sick fucks]] who regularly look at [[porn]] and [[gore]] to be [[ironic]]. /b/ will need to get creative. Only [[newfags]] try to [[rape|force]] [[raid]]s and think gore is the worst they can do. [[Lurk moar]] and get to know your enemy, [[cancer]].

How to properly troll tumblr

*Gorn The weak link in the tumblr community are naive [[16-year-old girl]]s and high school [[scene]] [[indie]] kids who use tumblr to [[camwhore]] and talk about their favorite shitty band like [[Blood on the Dance Floor]] and [[Katy Perry]]. These innocent naive kids who have been sheltered all their lives will be the ones most affected by gore and porn; the rest of the community spend 5 hours a day on the Internet and are not phased by gorn because in their [[hipster]] careers, they've seen [[Spaghettios|worse]].
**When you post up the gorn, tag it with #fashion, #love, #skins, #harry potter, #food, #art, #tom hiddleston, etc to ensure only the young/weak ones of their clan get the dosage. Try at best to follow the little naive kids and change your background to gorn.

*Heated arguments tumblr is comprised of cliques, not so much a whole community. tumblr has users from all around the world having many different interests whether it be [[furry]] porn or [[hentai]].
**Try to start race wars.
**Tell off the white [[liberal]] [[hippies]]
**Argue furiously about how they should become [[Christians]] to "save themselves"
**Tell them you hate [[gay]] rights
**Tell the tumblr trans that they're not really boys/girls/squirrels/whatever they identify as
**Do as any other ideological fight
**Say there are only two genders and that the other made up "genders and orientations" are non-existed.

*Javascript Remember that tumblr customization allows [[Javascript]]
**Google up HTML/Javascript redirect script and redirect them to nimp. Put on blog, put up hot profile pic of hipster chick, like a bunch of posts etc
***Or pretend to be a fashion blog and put the nimp link in the click through

*GPOYs and Topless Tuesdays Find the ugly ones and post them on ED for the world to marvel at the carnival/zoo that is tumblr

*Facebook The one thing that tumblr hates more than [[hipster]] shit are their [[16-year-old girl]] classmates. The best way to troll tumblr is to get as many high schoolers from [[Facebook]] to come over to tumblr and turn it into [[Myspace]]. Nothing infuriates them more than seeing cheerleaders typppe lykeeee dissss omggg and like, talk about the bessst boyfrann in teh worlddd!!111 <333333

*Recommended List if possible, get as many /b/rothas to recommend you into the recommend blogs to get more publicity

*Pro-anas and lias Search for "thinspo" "pro ana" "gb" etc and find some anorexic and bulimic girls, then go to their ask boxes and tell them how fat they are/how huge their thighs are to [[trigger]] them.

some moar general ideas for trolling tumblr

*Tell them since they all worship [[Kurt Cobain]] as an idol; they should all follow in his footsteps and become [[an hero]]s
*Find a average looking girl who enjoys [[pro-ana]] photography and [[trigger]] her into [[anorexia|ED]]
*Be conservative and tell others [[art school]] and [[homeless|majors in philosophy and English]] will lead nowhere in life
*Along with that; point out [[Lady Gaga]] sucks to [[faggots]] and be against all gay rights
*Point out stealing [[memes]] and [[poser|pretending to be like /b/]] doesn't make them awesome
*Call [[Michael Jackson]] a deranged pedophile
*Point out socially awkward penguin and Forever Alone are horrible and killing the ENTIRE Internet
*Misspell shit like crazy. tumblr users are [[Grammar Nazi]]s and will go ape shit over any spelling errors even if they're typos. For example make sure you fuck up the following: your and you're; Their, they're, and there; To, too, and two. However, you will not be accused of grammatical errors if you are black—https://www.frontpagemag.com/ucla-accused-racial-micro-aggression-mark-tapson/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">as that would be micro-racismhttps://thefederalistpapers.org/education-2/this-ucla-professor-called-racist-for-the-horrible-thing-he-did-to-a-black-student]," class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">and remember: blacks cannot be bad.
*Say [[indie|Arcade Fire] sucks major balls
*Follow them, then when they follow back, unfollow them
*Follow someone who hates your blog. When they ask/beg you to unfollow them (usually in the manner of a pretentious faggot), keep following them and like/reblog their posts often.
*Tell everyone that Joseph Gordon Levitt is sucking Taylor Lautner's cock
*Mention that you are [[pregnant loli|13 and pregnant]], enjoying partying and getting high, and pretend to like everything they like
*Pretend to be an awkward [[indie]] boy who [[faggot|plays in a band]], [[lie|studies philosophy]] and likes the same shitty music. Wait for fangirls; ask them for nudes, [[???]] [[PROFIT]]
*Say that Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold would hate them if they didn't kill themselves.
*Point out that calling David Carp [[Daddy_issues|daddy is creepy as fuck]]
*Be as conservative as possible. Make sure you make it abundantly clear that you hate the liberal agenda and want everyone to believe in Jesus.
*Support the [[Tea Party]] and be proud to be [[American]]
*Be against Marijuana legalization
*Say [[Twilight]] is better than [[Harry Potter]]
*Get as many [[16-year-old girl]]s from [[Facebook]] to join in order to infuriate tumblroids into complaining how it's turning into [[Myspace]]
*Be a cis-gendered, heterosexual, white male
*Post that tumblr will be deleting/Yahoo will be censoring their precious PORN!!1! Link to staff blog. Sit back and wait for the shitstorm. [[LOL|No need, as Tumblr really banned porn themselves for real]]
*Act ignorant and blissful in front of [[attention whores]] desperately trying to provoke you.
*[[Offended|Nuke their ask box]]
*Say John Green is a terrible author
*For a less subtle approach, simply begin throwing around racial slurs
*Tell them that their precious little blogs are meaningless in the grand scheme of things, and that they should stop wasting their time and commit suicide.
*Say any cartoons or shows that put in LGBTXYZ stuff in it are just there to pander and make money off them.

[[Fail|tumblr]] raids

[[At least 100 years ago]], tumblr has taken to poorly attempt [[Fail|trolling]], via [[Omegle]]. The trolling consisted mainly of starting chats, typing "HNNG", and if replied with a "HNNG", swapping tumblr urls. Obviously, we have much to learn from these [[Lies|overly advanced]] [[Retards|beings]]. Like all fags, they're incredibly easy to [[troll]].

#Go to Omegle on a tumblr troll day
#Start a chat with "HNNG" or "WHAT IS AIR"
#Ask for URL

tumblr hacked

? Notice the [[alien|chestburster dildo]] and [[emo]] comments.
File:tumblrposterchild.jpg|Let this child set the tone for all of the tumblrfags who think they can take on /b/.
File:tumblrfirstvictim.png|fuckyeahforeveralone gets hacked and blanked by [[b/|/b/]]
File:Paaulrex.tumblr.com_gets_owned.jpg‎|paaulrex.tumblr gets hacked|border=#36465D|background=#E5E5E5}}
}}

, secretly butthurt.

|Sorry dumbshit /b/tards, but I'm not gonna let your shitface cock sucking 4chan ruin my tumblr sanctuary.


SO BEAT IT OR I’LL GET SCARY.
|

(ALSO A [[NIGGER]] LOL)

|I swear if they shut down my tumblr, I’m gonna go grab my machine gun and hunt em all down and kill them one by one, whoever the fuck is running that shit.


Just sayin.
|

|[[LOL|If my account gets hacked by 4chan…


Then imma be so happy ‘cause that means i’m famous enough to get hacked!]]
|

|let me the first to say, 4chan is a worthless piece of shit. At least Tumblr looks decent, it looks like a four-year-old built their site. BRING IT CUNTS.
|

|4chan is trying to shut down Tumblr through hacking the site..


Well guess what, FUCK YOU 4CHAN. I don’t care what your reasoning is, but if you shut down Tumblr, [[DO IT FAGGOT|I will personally come after you.]]
|

|[[trying too hard|Well, obviously we have a Troll here on Tumblr,


They’re trolling all of our blogs, tryina shut our site down, so if they do it y’all gon need to..
Pack your blogs, hide your posts, pack your blogs, hide your posts, pack your blogs, hide your posts,
And say goodbye to Tumblr, cuz they’re shuttin us down in November.


They don’t have to come and confess, we know who they are. They’re so stupid, they’re so stupid.
This isn’t the first time, not the first time, not the first time, tumblr’s been down for maintenance.


You’ve got our IP, trying to spread fear and all. You are so dumb, you are really dumb, for real.
You say you’re gonna shut us down on the 14th, and you say that you’ve been working on it already.
So dumb, so dumb, so dumb so….


They’re trolling all of our blogs, tryina shut our site down, so if they do it y’all gon need to..
Pack your blogs, hide your posts, pack your blogs, hide your posts, pack your blogs, hide your posts,
And say goodbye to Tumblr, cuz they’re shuttin us down in November.


They don’t have to come and confess, we know who they are. They’re so stupid, they’re so stupid.
This isn’t the first time, not the first time, not the first time, tumblr’s been down for maintenance.]]
|

|We are like the Civilized version of 4chan
|

|BRING IT ON 4CHAN!!!! BRING. IT. ON!!!!!!!
|

|Tumblr Dumbledore’s Army, 4chan Death Eaters, we’re stronger, and better. they will fail.
|

|If 4chan is so big and mighty, then why the hell have I not heard of them untill today?


I’ve been trollin’ on the Internet wayyyy before I found the life I now call tumblr, and 4chan has always been unheard of to me.


So, I can’t help but laugh at this threat.
It might turn out to be try, but right now it kinda sounds like a bunch of DnD nerds who still live in their mothers basements. |

|COUNTER-TROLL. Go to /b/, now, and see what it’s like. Go there post a thread saying ” Hai guise!!!1!!! I’m from Tumb1r!!! Oh, yeah THE GAME. Lololol.”(or post anything else but say you’re from Tumblr) and then leave they’ll get all mad and troll that thread and waste their time. Veryy simple.
|

|lolololol /b/ try and fuck with us, just try.
|

|4Chan Is Apparently Taking Down Tumblr?


So apparently some fags are taking down Tumblr because they’re jelly? Seriously leave Tumblr alone and get some fresh air, crack open your basement window if you nerds have to. Obviously your plan isn’t going to work, people who love the site are going to work hard to get it running back up in no time. Bring on the LOIC cannon Oldfags.
|

|If some Porno bitch hacks my tumblr tomorrow


I’ll go ape shit.
|

}}|border=#36465D|background=#E5E5E5}}
}}

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11/14/2010: DOOMSDAY

Comparable to the [[2012]] of tumblr, dumbshits all over start freaking out at their impending doom. Naive simpletons simply blanked their page and put in a "lock layout", convinced somehow changing the layout automatically means not being able to be hacked. "4chan" charts [[Twitter]] trends and various blog sites who have nothing better to talk about join in on the fun. tumblrfags bid goodbye to their "precious followers" and deactivated their accounts.
Desperate and helpless, many start turning to [[Jew|David Karp]], their glorious owner and beg him for help on his twitter account. Everyone starts referring to him as "Daddy", used as in "Daddy's gonna save us" and "Don't worry, Daddy's here!".

When the [[DDoS]] attack of 11/14 began, /b/ was pumped already. Few minutes in, tumblr was down for 1/3 and slowing for the rest. David Karp disabled ask on his blog.

However, some mod took down 4chan's domain but the boards were still up. Dumbshits believed tumblr to have reversed DDoSd 4chan when in reality /b/ was betrayed by their own mods (some argue because the bad publicity was going to ruin moot's new project, Canvas). The confusion result in neither website having permanent damage but instead of [[Anonymous]] getting a sex slave. Thus out of the ashes, [[shit no one cares about|4chumblr]] was born. The epitome of everything [[cancer]], [[newfag]] and lack of organizational skill ruled by the [[ADHD]] and sex drive.

https://techcrunch.com/2010/11/14/tumblr-4chan-war/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">TECHCRUNCH ATTEMPTS TO DECLARE TUMBLR VICTORY; NEED TO LURK MOAR

12/6/2010 AKA SLOWEST NEWS DAY EVER

tumblr went down somewhere around the night of 12/5/2010 apparently because the 16 people at staff couldn't handle the length and girth that is the [[big]] [[nigger]] [[cock]] of a server maintenance. They managed to fuck up their database and promises to be "[[Lie|Back shortly]]", despite the fact tumblr has been down for a day. News media who apparently are [[butthurt]] over the fact they didn't get to cover the 4chan vs tumblr story, along with having the slowest news day possibly imaginable, starts covering the story of tumblr's downtime with intense detailed and watch eye stalking tumblr's twitter for any update no matter how small and insignificant and includes using random people's tweets as viable journalism sources. [[CNN]], [[Gawker]], Techcrunch, and god knows who else.

It's gone down many (MANY) times since then. DDOS attacks are almost guaranteed to be the major reason. But they won't discuss it with anyone. Not even journalistshttps://www.cnet.com/tech/services-and-software/tumblr-goes-dark-with-massive-outage/][https://www.inquisitr.com/456030/tumblr-outage-servers-blamed-for-third-outage-of-december][https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/breaking-tumblr-reportedly-down-europe-9498132]." class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Try outage.report or Currentlydown for plenty of complaints.

Yahoo buyout

[[Last Thursday], Tumblr sold out to [[Yahoo]], the bestest Internet corporation ever ([[HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS|disregard that]]). David Karp, founder of tumblr, has been paid delicious [[Homosexual|pork]] money to let Yahoo keep its grip on what's left of the biggest hive of hipsters to ever exist. Unsurprisingly, the remaining mass of tumblr's "rebellious" userbase of obese 14-year-old scene kiddies and 30-year-old brony poon hunters reacted before the buyout was even confirmed.

Then Yahoo tried to destroy it BUT FAILED:

In 2017 Yahoo went under and was https://www.thedailybeast.com/tumblr-led-the-net-neutrality-fightthen-verizon-bought-it" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">bought by [[Verizon]]. Thus did (another) BIG FEAR strike the Tumblrites. A social site known for its extreme [[liberal]] slant and support for [[net neutrality]] suddenly found itself pwned by the biggest anti-net-neutrality shitmonster of all time.

12/17/2018: ANOTHER DOOMSDAY

For reasons no one outside of KarpWorld knows (lol), and despite a declining userbase, Tumblr management decided to https://help.tumblr.com/hc/en-us/articles/231885248-Sensitive-content" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">"remove all adult content". Since the Tumblr iOS app had been https://www.theverge.com/2018/11/20/18104366/tumblr-ios-app-child-pornography-removed-from-app-store" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">pulled from the Apple Store ([[CP]] OMG) it was https://www.valuewalk.com/tumblr-ios-app-store-shut-down/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">correctly assumed that this might be the death knell for the service. "OHGODHOGOD WHERE WILL I POST MY LESBIAN FURRY FISTFUCKING CARTOONS". Forgotten was https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-45323287" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">their previous ban of "creepshots".

What the Tumblrettes seemed to fail to grasp is that not only was the site hosting CP posted by bot accounts, it was hosting CP from an 'industry standard' database known to the FBI and CIA, stuff that they've [[Party Van|v&]] countless creeps for in the past, and yet Tumblr didn't do anything about it (instead making updates that involved [[Shit no one cares about|rainbow text and 'funny' post formatting]]) until Apple bitch slapped them by getting rid of their shitty app.

Notice all the caveats and exceptions: flat-out photographed porn (plentiful) is banned but "art illustrations" of an adult nature (also plentiful) were still okay. https://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/talkingtech/2018/12/03/tumblr-ban-all-adult-content-site-beginning-dec-17/2193156002/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Screaming https://www.theverge.com/2018/12/3/18123752/tumblr-adult-content-porn-ban-date-explicit-changes-why-safe-mode" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">hellshit https://jezebel.com/r-i-p-tumblr-which-just-banned-porn-1830824929" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">resulted. Media outlets https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-6455973/Tumblr-ban-adult-content-site-huge-porn-crackdown.html" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">fell over https://mashable.com/article/tumblr-bans-adult-content-policy" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">each other to declare "the death of Tumblr".

Yes there was a frontpage

. Yes it was heavily censored. And the Tumblr-sucking dickheads of [[Metafilter]] inevitably had to https://www.metafilter.com/178026/Tumblr-Bans-Reason-Most-People-Have-Heard-of-Tumblr" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">whine at each other.



Months later, "news" reports commented on Tumblr's "unexpected" sudden drop in traffic. https://www.independent.co.uk/tech/tumblr-porn-ban-nsfw-verizon-yahoo-adult-content-a8817546.html][https://thenextweb.com/news/tumblr-traffic-dropped-by-nearly-100m-the-month-after-it-banned-porn]" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">The pathetic hypocrites at [[The Mary Sue] posted a https://www.themarysue.com/tumblr-fandoms-post-ban/" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">long whine. The rest of the world failed to notice. Because? Tumblr is just another shitty website for basement mutants.

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Galleries

File:tumblr Confessions - MLP turning gay.png|tumblr turns you gay
File:Clop made me realize that I''m gay.jpeg
File:tumblr Confessions - Pokemon Cilan rape.png
File:tumblr Confessions - SW Jar Jar sexy piece of ass.png
File:tumblr Confessions - YGO fart.jpg
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Quotes

See also

*[[16-year-old girl]]s
*[[Art School|Art school]]
*[[Attention Whore|Attention whores]]
*[[Bronies]]
*[[Butthurt]]
*[[Columbiners]]
*[[Dashcon]]
*[[Don't Hug Me I'm Scared]]
*[[Hipsters]] – Everyone who isn't one on tumblr wants these dead.
*[[Homosexuality]] – Going on tumblr will make you crave [[cock]].
*[[Indie]]
*[[Josh Macedo]]
*[[Keep Calm and Carry On]]
*[[Memes]] – Tumblr's main job in life is to steal memes from [[Reddit]].
*[[Millennials]] / [[Generation Z]] – 99% of its users.
*[[Neo-classic-neko]]
*[[Personal Pronouns|Personal pronouns]] – Utter horseshit that tumblr promotes.
*[[Pokémon]]
*[[Scoutgender]]
*[[Social justice]]
*[[Special Snowflake Syndrome]]
*[[Transgender]] – Tumblr's favorite mental disorder.
*[[Trigger Warning|Trigger warning]]
*[[Tumblr panels]]
*[[Twatter]]
*[[Undertale]]
*[[Unwarranted Self Importance]]
*[[Vader]]
*[[Waaaambulance]]

External links

*https://www.thedailybeast.com/russians-used-reddit-and-tumblr-to-troll-the-2016-election" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">"Russian propaganda factory had a TERRIFYING 21 (twenty-one) separate blogs on Tumblr in 2016 - So, obviously the election should be re-run, then. (Archived:

)
*https://www.theverge.com/2018/12/5/18126451/tumblr-porn-social-media-ban" class="text-indigo-600 dark:text-indigo-400 hover:underline" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">RIP Tumblr: 2007-2018

[[Category:tumblr| ]]
[[Category:Sites]]
[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]

|[[Jakelin Caal]]}}